Friday, March 31, 2006

Happy Tears


I cry every day. Oh, not because anything is wrong at all! Actually, because I can't believe how much isn't wrong. It's easy to look at Adam and Eleanor now and to think they are "normal". Except for the oxygen, which will probably be gone soon, there are few signs, at least for now, of their frightening beginning. Eleanor will always have her scar on her back from her PDA surgery and Adam has a big X shaped scar on his left calf, I am assuming from a PICC line. But that's it. They eat, they grow, they smile (a lot) and they are doing the things they should be doing for babies at just over 2 months. But we really don't know what Adam and Eleanor's future holds at this point. They have so much going for them--particularly, negative cranial ultrasounds from the very beginning--but their little bodies went through so much, we just don't know. I thank God every day that I have the opportunity to take care of them, to cuddle them when the cry, to change multitudes of diapers, and to clean up the formula Adam spits up on to the carpet for the hundredth time. All we know is that no matter what, we will love them completely. I wish that there would come a time when we could put their preemie beginning behind us for good. But I really don't think that will ever happen. We are so fortunate, so blessed to have 23 week preemies doing as well as they are. Most people don't know much about premature babies--I know I didn't before Adam and Eleanor--but not only is their survival a complete miracle, but the way they have come through this ordeal without any major problems is almost unheard of. I've searched on the internet, I've read a bunch of reasearch. There are few examples of 23 week twins at all, let alone examples with babies with no IVH, no hernias, no ROP, no eating aversions, weight gain already on the charts for unadjusted age, and as of today, reaching appropriate developmental milestones for adjusted age. It almost makes me afraid to think that things will keep going so well. This just doesn't happen. Please keep praying for them, though, like I know everyone has been for the past six months. I really can't think that their good fortune and ours, has not had to do with the incredible amount of prayer said for them over these past months. People sometimes use the term "miracle" lightly--I never will again. Thank you to everyone for all that you have done for us. In our crazy busy-ness we may forget to say anything, but we appreciate all that you have done for us, and for Alex, Adam, and Eleanor. Of course, here I am crying again.
Baby updates...Both Eleanor and Adam are starting to roll over! They can get to their sides, but that stinkin' arm gets in the way and they just don't know what to do with it. Adam is also batting at toys and Eleanor can hold her rattle for while and shake it. I don't really think she knows what she's doing, but I'll take it!

2 comments:

JP said...

Michelle-
Talk about miracles! You've got TWO amazing babies! I'm so glad you posted on Halle's blog. It's not often I find other 23wkrs to cheer on. I haven't had time to read through their entire blog yet but they are cuties! Do you know/have you found Holland & Eden's blog? They're micro-twins that graduated from StJoe NICU as well. You probably have, but here's their site just in case:
http://micropreemietwins.blogspot.com/
Take care,
Julie

The Ryan Family said...

Yea for Eleanor & Adam! Beautiful babies!
I have 28 weeker b/g twins, and I love reading about other preemies who are doing so great! Truly amazing...

Kristina Ryan